It's a few days since my last post and I'm still going through the whole emotional thing, just so ya know.
I had one of those days that's so hard to describe, or there are so many adjectives that come to mind at once to describe it, that all you can say is...weird.
How shall I begin?
I had an interview today at 11 with a medical staffing agency in center cilly Phitty. Teehee. And I mean the very center. As in, the little section of the city that is square and City Hall is in the middle of it. That's where it was at. Before I left this morning I google-mapped the route, not because I didn't know how to get there (I have a gps anyway) but because they now show you traffic delays. First lesson learned, don't listen to google map traffic delays. At least not if you're driving to Philly. No matter what it says, anything, anything at all, is better than driving on the Schuykill Express aka 76. Even jumping into the Schuykill river itself and doggy-paddling down it would get you there faster and help you keep your sanity longer. For those of you from around here thinking "durrr didn't you know that?". Yes, yes I did. But google maps fooled me into thinking the alternate routes had worse traffic. Don't ever believe that for a minute, folks.
So after getting off the turnpike with the possibility that it didn't register my ez pass and I'll have to pay a $50 fine, I was already thinking, "this trip sucks". Then I'm driving down 76 and too soon I thought "wow I don't think traffic has ever been so light on this road!" I made it all the way to the exit for City Ave where PCOM is, and soon after that, I hit a wall of traffic. I was literally 5 miles from my destination, and it was 9:45AM. I had basically an extra hour, so no biggie, right? WRONG. An hour later I had moved 3 miles closer. I can handle city driving no problem. I'm pretty good at it actually. But city traffic? It brings out a whole other awful side of me. And I'm proud of myself because I actually kept cool for most of it...until I realized I was going to be late. Ugh. At 11:15 I finally reached the place and still had to find somewhere to park. I had hoped to have time to sniff around for a free/cheap spot. Instead frustrated, desperate and in an "I don't care anymore" mood I pulled into a valet parking garage a few buildings down, parked the car with windows down at the entrance, practically threw my keys at the guy and ran off, not even caring that my car had garbage everywhere in it, as well as valuables. (And btw, I gave my entire key ring with ALL of my keys. Not my extra valet key. I just now realized this.) I distinctly remember thinking "I don't even care if my car gets stolen right now, I'M 30 MINUTES LATE FOR MY INTERVIEW. I'll worry about my car later". HAHAHA. I think I was certifiably crazy at that point. Other thoughts that were further back in my head nagging: "what if this is like Ferris Bueller? I just gave my keys, and left my car...to a totally shady dude. Is that how you're supposed to do it? Am I forgetting anything? I just gave my car to some guy. AND it's open with stuff in it in public on the busiest street in the entire city of Philadelphia with 50,000 people walking around. This is gonna cost so much...if I even get my car back. I don't care how much this will cost, let me just get to this dang interview."
The interview was ok. I'm pretty certain once all the papers are in, I'll get offered a spot. But it was weird because 50 minutes out of the hour I was there was just filling out an application and other paperwork and it sort of seemed pointless because I'll most likely have to go back, again. Maybe I can convince the woman to just do it over the phone, she seemed cool about things and she knows I don't live in the area yet.
And that's really all I have to say about that part of my day, the whole reason I drove there.
Well, I got back to the parking garage, paid $18 for being there an hour and ten minutes (just missed the much cheaper hour rate), and waited at the exit while someone went to drive my car down. That's when I became a little more aware of my surroundings for the first time, and it was laughably awkward because it was clearly a rich people parking garage. Everyone around me was dressed in suits and business attire, and every car that was parked was black, shiny, leather-seated and window-tinted...Mercedes, Lexi (plural of Lexus haha) Audis etc. One of the guys working there was standing near me and at first I didn't even notice him because I was somewhat staring off in my own little world. But he asked me how my day was and snapped me out of it and we ended up talking until my car got there. He was one of those people that's just immediately likeable, and I didn't notice until later that he brightened my day and took away some of the anxiety and dread and replaced it with calm and a little more clarity. But the best part was when an attendant pulled up with my dinky, opaque-from-dirt, little blue garbage-filled civic next to all those other cars. I felt so awesome. And I was worried my car would get taken...who in that parking garage would've wanted it? But I marched to my car and played it cool like it was a Rolls Royce and I did this everyday, while all the rich people looked on (and probably laughed at me). And hey, you know what? Even if it were a Ferris Bueller situation, my car would've been last on the list of "ooh let's drive that one around!" for one, and for two, even if I were driving a Ferrari, they knew I was only going to be gone an hour and in that traffic, they would've made it a block away and back.
My next stop was Jim's on South and 4th streets for cheesesteaks. the people working there were really awesome and friendly and just for the 10 minutes I was there it made me really happy to talk to them. Picture an over-the-top flirty, over weight, 35ish-year-old latino man, and you've got an idea. Plus I got a cherry coke (my favorite) for a dollar. AND the parking lot on the street right behind the restaurant was only charging a dollar per hour. Walked outta there with my head held a little higher feeling a little better about myself.
This sounds ridiculous but despite big plans to do lots of other exciting things, by then I was already really exhausted. The drive there emotionally drained me. So lastly I wanted to check out the Manayunk and Germantown areas, because that's where I've been looking into getting a place to live. I made it about 10 yards into Manayunk and knew that I absolutely did not want to live there. Period. Can't exactly tell you why, I just knew. So from there I headed home. On a non-toll highway, since I've decided the turnpike and ez pass currently hate me.
So here's why today was weird:
1.) It really really sucked. I drove all the way to Philly for an interview that turned out to not really be much of an interview at all. On my way there I may or may not have accidently slipped thru the ez pass and will get charged for it. I drove through emotionally traumatic traffic and just completely freaked out over being late. I was so distraught over running late I carelessly handed my car (and every key I own) off in the most expensive parking garage in the state of Pennsylvania and ran to my interview sweaty and tired and grumpy. I spent an hour filling out paper work. I had trouble feeling calm or cheerful the rest of the day, and after a few short stops, wanted to get the heck outta there.
2.) It somehow turned out to be a good day too. On the drive home as I was thinking about it all, it occured to me "I met the nicest, friendliest people today" and all of a sudden I started bawling. I didn't realize at first how disappointing everything really was, how much I was holding in, and what a difficult time I was having. I could perfectly see myself from their point of view, the crappiness of my day clearly evident on my face, looking down at the ground dejectedly, lost in thought. But in the end it wasn't so crappy. My day was saved by the kindness of random strangers.
3.) The parking garage story ended up being really excellent. One of those that I'll be telling for probably the rest of my life. My mom told my Grandpa about it and she said the thought of my car all alone among a fleet of shnazzy shiny expensive cars had him laughing so hard he couldn't stop for awhile.
3.) The parking garage story ended up being really excellent. One of those that I'll be telling for probably the rest of my life. My mom told my Grandpa about it and she said the thought of my car all alone among a fleet of shnazzy shiny expensive cars had him laughing so hard he couldn't stop for awhile.
4.) Out of just about every bad thing that happened, I learned or figured something out that will really help:
a. When it comes to living and traveling, I am not a city girl, no sir. I like to hang out in cities, and it's definitely cool to be near one. But I don't need to live in one. In fact I think I refuse. Suburbs and public transportation are perfect, thank you.
b. The good news is PCOM is on the edge of the city on the west shore of the Schuykill and if I live on the west side in Delaware county, I'm in a calmer section but still close enough to go do fun things in the city. So I've figured out where I should live that's perfect for me, and realized where I don't need to be.
c. I also would prefer to work/have clients in surrounding areas of the city. Working with a high-risk client is already emotionally draining. And if driving in traffic wears me out that much, there's no way I'll be able to handle driving into the city thru traffic like that and pay insane amounts for parking every time in order to start a session with a client. I'll already be dead before I even see them and won't be able to do my job properly.
c. I also would prefer to work/have clients in surrounding areas of the city. Working with a high-risk client is already emotionally draining. And if driving in traffic wears me out that much, there's no way I'll be able to handle driving into the city thru traffic like that and pay insane amounts for parking every time in order to start a session with a client. I'll already be dead before I even see them and won't be able to do my job properly.
d. If I get the job with that company, I know where they're located now. And will take the metro and walk there! (And can hopefully use that in case I end up with a city client anyway.)
e. I still really like this place, the food, the history, and especially after today, the people!
f. Everything bad has a good outcome.
Good, bad, stressful, weird...whatever today was, I'm just glad it's over.
P.S. News of my 5k will be coming very soon. ;)
